Creating Memories

This weekend I am rolling solo.  I am  back in my home town for a wedding. But that is not what this entry is about. Its about what truly lasts in the mind of a child.

Due to my haste to make my flight I didn't bring a dress shirt. So this morning, off I went to the mall. The freeway exit for the mall is the same one that takes me to the cemetery where my mom's body is burried. I am deliberate in the way I phrase that for reasons that I will get to in a moment.

As I approached the exit a very sentimental song about lost loved ones came on the radio. I had enough time to hear the first few lines and still decide if I would stop at the cemetery. I rarely visit  because, 1) I know my mother is not there, and 2) rather than flowers at a grave site, I aim to honor her memory by living out the best things she taught me everyday.

Today I stopped.  The song is in full swing now and really getting heavy. I should be all choked up at this point. Everything is cool, no water works. After a few minutes of searching I find the marker. There is her name, birth date and the day she left this world. I stand there pondering what will happen next, it has been years so will I break down? Nothing!

All I can think about are the great meals she not only prepared but taught me how to cook. I can still hear those belly laughs that came when she talked with her sisters on the phone for hours. Then there are the relationship skills she taught me that I use even now to be a better husband. All I can do is grin from ear to ear. 

This ten minute detour heightened my desire to create memories with my children. Memories that can be passed on and embellished upon (hopefully in my favor). Memories that will bring a smile or give direction after I am long gone, which I hope doesn't happen for another seventy years or so.

If your kids are old enough, ask them about the best time they have ever had with dad. If they have to think about it for more than ten seconds, get to work! Just remember, no pressure, its about what they take - not what you give.